Redefining Rockel

You know I never discuss female thermodynamics - Lou; Rescue Me

Poll

Rockel Recipes

Untested Recipes (1)

All Recipes (6)

Peeps

Politics

News

Fake News

Stuff

The Film of the Week

The WORD of the Week

Matthew 3:7-10

But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming to where he was baptizing, he said to them: "You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance.

And do not think you can say to yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father.' I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham.

The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.

Stupid Fact of the Week

There was only one civilian casualty during the three-day Battle of Gettysburg

27 February, 2007

School's In Session

ENGL S-185 Wit and Humor (31802)

(4 credits: UN, GR, NC) T,Th 3:30-6 pm. Eight-week session. Tuition $2,275.

Emphasizing wit and humor rather than "comedy" as classically understood, the course considers selected texts and films (for example, Mark Twain, P. G. Wodehouse, Dave Barry, Dr. Strangelove, Annie Hall, Monty Python) in the light of theoretical studies by psychologists, sociologists, and critics who have tried to explain why people laugh, want to laugh, and pay to be made to laugh.

I may have to take some summer classes.

posted by Rockel @ 5:56 PM 2 comments

26 February, 2007

14-Hour Day

Give it up for Overtime.

Give it up for my beloved Rockelburton.

Now... to make good on a friendly wager:

When I look out at my glorious kingdom of always being right, I see a landscape littered with those who thought they could defeat me.

I was arrogant but then again I was always right.

But darkness has fallen upon my mighty kingdom and I have shamed the crown and my liege, Emperor Andronicus and his Lordship, The Dosai.

For woe unto me, there came a valiant knight, from a land far away. The battle was tough, it was long, it was a glorious undertaking but alas I have failed.

I, Matthew Rockel, ruler of everything from as far left as my left eye can see and as far right as my right eye can see, do hearby announce my resignation from the thrown of know-all.

Mr. Cathey aka The Red One has descended upon high from the Garden State and slain me. I suggest you bow down to his Oscar worthy greatness as I will.

Thank you and God Bless.

Peace

Love

and Jersey.

posted by Rockel @ 7:44 PM 0 comments

25 February, 2007

The 79th Annual Academy Awards

OFFICIAL RESULTS:

Custer, the younger - 14.1
Ryan's Daddy - 12.1
John "the" Cathey - 11.1
The Rockel - 10.3
"Lind-" Mendenhall - 9.2
Ryan "Michelle" Lee - 6.1

-- ellen is on stage. all picks are in. all bets are off.
-- al gore joke, check. gospel choir, check. jack nicholson's hair........
-- Mendenhall and Custer ride Labyrinth to an early lead.
-- will ferrel, jack black, john c riley... excellent
-- two awards, two awards for Labyrinth... Custer's the man to beat.
-- THE DANISH POET!!! HA! Thank you, voters.
-- West Bank... great short... good speech. (Mom mention number 1)
-- Iwo Jima gives us a "Thanks Dad"... Mom: 1, Dad: 1
-- SOCIAL! a point for everybody as a musical picks up the oscar for sound mixing... Mom: 2
-- ALAN!!! woohoo! Way to go Arkin! No points for anybody.
-- New Leader! Lind takes out Custer with an upset.
-- and just like that, custer back out in front. is there any catching him?
-- JC's dark horse pays off as he claims Costume... Mom: 3... and a KUBRICK mention.
-- was that Tucker Carlson?
-- "Make sure we're both in it, Steven."
-- LABYRINTH, baby. The Academy loves it...
-- I want to be Guillermo del Toro... his people all love him.
-- side note... these commercials: way better than the super bowl ads... what's up with that?
-- GERMANY. represent. big upset. no points for anyone.
-- Mom: 4....
-- Jeniffer Hudson - 1... Scorsese, Kubrick, O'Toole, Bening, Finney, Altman, Weir, Hitchcock, Burton, O'Toole - 0
-- Rockel goes a perfect 3-0 on the tiebreakers... should've made those worth more.
-- "Truth" wins documentary... Ryan hides face as Obvious tag laughs in it.
-- with 8 awards still to be presented, Ryan "Michelle" Lee, "Lind-" Mendenhall, and Ryan's Daddy find themselves too far behind the Custer, with too few moving categories remaining. There will be no bragging rights for them. But remember, you're all winners just for being nominated.
-- The Custer looks solid... The Cathey can catch him, The Rockel can surpass him... will either happen? Magic 8 ball says: Try again later.
-- Custer coasts to victory with Original Score...
-- Cathey makes his way past The Rockel with "Sunshine".... not good.
-- Dreamgirls, despite having a majority in the category, can't clinch a best song award.
-- Film edit goes to Departed... no points for anyone.
-- Ryan's Daddy clinches at least a tie for second
-- SOCIAL!!! oscar for helen, points for everyone.
-- Michelle drops another point, clinches last place, as my boy Forest gets all emotional. Mom: 5
-- Ford Coppola, Lucas, Spielberg... that's some firepower on stage.
-- SOCIAL!!!! points for everyone as Scorsese finally makes it onto the stage... needless to say, STANDING O
-- And it all comes down to picture: Babel puts Daddy solely in second, with Rockel securing third, beating out Cathey in the head-to-head... Sunshine puts Cathey in a tie for 2nd with Daddy... Iwo Jima gives Michelle one final burst of glory... and the winner is.......
-- The Departed!!! no points for anyone.

posted by Rockel @ 4:58 PM 5 comments

Only Minutes

Six contestants deep, there is now room for movement in all the categories except four. Apparently, we're all very confident that the Oscar-less director will relinquish his title this year.

The Nominees are:
Custer, the younger
John "the" Cathey
Ryan "Michelle" Lee
"Lind-" Mendenhall
Ryan's Daddy
The Rockel

The list of nominees closes when Ellen takes the stage.

And the winner is...

Rockel, duh.

posted by Rockel @ 4:43 PM 0 comments

Only Hours Now

Cathey's in.

Are you?

There's still time.

Bragging rights for the winner. Absolutely nothing for everyone else.

posted by Rockel @ 11:09 AM 2 comments

24 February, 2007

One Day More

Clock is ticking, people.

Luke and I are locked in.

Here's me:

ACTOR-LEADING: Forest Whitaker
ACTOR-SUPPORTING: Eddie Murphy
ACTRESS-LEADING: Helen Mirren
ACTRESS-SUPPORTING: Cate Blanchett
ANIMATED FEATURE: Cars
ART DIRECTION: Dreamgirls
CINEMATOGRAPHY: Pan's Labyrinth
COSTUME DESIGN: Dreamgirls
DIRECTING: The Departed (Scorcese)
DOCUMENTARY FEATURE: An Inconvenient Truth
FILM EDITING: Babel
FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM: Pan's Labyrinth
MAKEUP: Pan's Labyrinth
ORIGINAL SCORE: Notes on a Scandal (Philip Glass)
ORIGINAL SONG: "Listen"-Dreamgirls
BEST PICTURE: Babel
SCREENPLAY-ADAPTED: The Departed
SCREENPLAY ORIGINAL: Babel
SOUND EDITING: Letters From Iwo Jima
SOUND MIXING: Dreamgirls
VISUAL EFFECTS: Pirates of the Carribean: Dead Man's Chest
DOCUMENTARY SHORT: The Blood of the Yingzhou District
SHORT FILM-ANIMATED: The Danish Poet
SHORT FILM-LIVE ACTION: West Bank Story

Luke and I differ on all of four categories (excluding the tie-breakers)... should be a tight race. And since I'm pretty sure I've shot myself in the foot with the whole not voting for Jeniffer Hudson thing (which, even still, I'm not going back on), I've really gotta make up some ground in the remaining 3 categories... and since I only picked my boy Philip Glass to win Original score because, well, he's the man and deserves one, I'm not feeling real confident about that one either... which means I've only got 2 categories to gain ground... maybe it'll come down to the tie-breaker... in which case I have to pray that the voters won't fall for the sentimental favorite Match Girl, and go with the greater work, namely, Poet.... Not real confident of that, either...

oh well... as long as I beat the Cathey, all will be well... more on that later.

18 hours and counting.

Bring it, slackers.

posted by Rockel @ 7:35 PM 2 comments

20 February, 2007

Oscar Predictions, part ii

Only a few days left... the competition awaits...
get your predictions in before it's too late... s...

And, yes. I left "Best Director," or "Achievement in Directing," (or "Will Scorsese Actually Win One Before He Dies") off of the list of "Main Categories" in the previous post.

My fault entirely. It will, of course, be considered along with all the others.

Here is an updated list:

Main Categories (1 point each) -
ACTOR - LEADING
ACTOR - SUPPORTING
ACTRESS - LEADING
ACTRESS - SUPPORTING
ANIMATED FEATURE
ART DIRECTION
CINEMATOGRAPHY
COSTUME DESIGN
DIRECTING
DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
FILM EDITING
FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
MAKEUP
ORIGINAL SCORE
ORIGINAL SONG
BEST PICTURE
SCREENPLAY - ADAPTED
SCREENPLAY - ORIGINAL
SOUND EDITING
SOUND MIXING
VISUAL EFFECTS

Tie Breaking Categories (0.1 point each)-
DOCUMENTARY SHORT
SHORT FILM - ANIMATED
SHORT FILM - LIVE ACTION

This amounts to a possible grand total of 21.3 points.

I'm extremely close to finalizing my predictions, but I'm still struggling with how many risks I'm willing to take.

I won't give away any of my uber dark horses, but I will tell you this much: You will certainly not see Jennifer Hudson on my list. No, I haven't seen the film. Yes, I should. Maybe I will. No, it won't sway my opinion. Way too many things wrong here: -young actress, -first film, -first nod, -musical... all of which go against all of my beliefs... okay, maybe only most of my beliefs, but still.

Outside of that, I'm playing it safe in a lot of categories... going against my gut in a few others... and showing my love in one or two.

It's an odd mix this year... a couple categories seem completely solidified, but there's a bunch still up in the air.

For example: Original Score. Some really good work there, but none of the regulars: Williams, Shore, Elfman, Zimmer, Horner...

A lot of new names, along with quite a few vets. O'Toole: will he be around another year? Will the people vote accordingly?

So much to think about.

I'm not working this week. Let's all take a moment to give it up for paid vacations.

So, I think I'm gonna make my way up to the Triad and check out The Secret Garden, and then maybe head over to the Triangle for King Lear with Greg and Ryan. Then back to the homestead for the Ceremonies before *sigh* returning to work on Monday.

Bragging rights are on the line, people. Predict away.

Labels: films, nazionale, oscars

posted by Rockel @ 8:21 PM 3 comments

19 February, 2007

Julie Taymor

She's absolutely brilliant...
and she has a new film coming out...
with all new recordings of Beatles songs...

Across the Universe

Labels: beatles, films

posted by Rockel @ 11:33 AM 1 comments

10 February, 2007

Here We Go...

Blogger finally made me switch over to "The New Blogger." So, here we are... nothing changed.

But, we usher in a new era of Rockel under the ever-watchful eye of Google (a subsidiary of God)...

...because...

wow. That's an unimpressive pic.

Oh, well... on with the show.

The news...
As I've said before, I think you all know this anyway... but in case there are a few I missed, and just so I can go on the record as saying it...

referencing this previous post...

I am Raleigh bound this weekend, in honor of the Emperor... but I shall return to beautiful, picturesque Indian Trail, NC... until late March, perhaps early-mid April, but (please, God) no later...

At which point...

As you can see, this wonderful(ly tiny) picture depicts an angel (see the cool, blue wings)... or rather, angels... since there are two of them...

and I don't know about you guys, but I'm definitely getting some kind of Spanish or Latin feel from this piece... so we'll call them "los angeles"...

and as you can see, "los angeles" are trying to free themselves of this earth... or at least, the one in the background is... I have no idea what is going on with the one in the fore... but they are tied down...

...bound, if you will.

Or, as Robbie Williams would say:

"I'm moving to L.A."

So... there you have it... if you already knew, you still know now, so really no loss to you... and if you didn't know, congratulations, now you know...

But, as a little extra treat to make this extra-special event that much more memorable (as if we need it, I mean come on, we've got Google, we've got crappy art, L.A., Robbie Williams...), here's a little something from a new script...

The focus of the story is on the human soul. The essence of, the desire for, the implications of, the search for, etc.

The main story focuses on three young men: Adam, Brian, and Jeremy. Their stories run concurrently throughout the entire script and are seemingly unrelated until very near the end.

In act one,
Brian meets Heather and they have a romance that discusses the idea of soul mates...
Jeremy hangs out with Gus, an old artist, and they discuss life...
Adam is in session with Dr. Robert Lucas, a psychiatrist, and they discuss the consequences of action...

At the end of act one,
Brian goes off to war...
Gus commits suicide...

Adam's story is the one that ties everything together at the end of the story and so his story line has very little solid resolution at the close of Act 1...

This is a selection from a scene very near the beginning of the script, between Adam and Dr. Lucas.

ROBERT: Adam. You were saying?
ADAM: Oh. Yeah. (pause) Do you... Do you believe in a soul, Robert?
ROBERT: Dr. Lucas, please.
ADAM: Do you believe in a soul, Dr. Lucas?
ROBERT: The soul... is a very interesting concept.
ADAM: Yes. Yes it is. Do you believe we have one? That is - not to say - a collective one, between the two of us - but rather that you and I - all humanity - individually, have... one?
ROBERT: I can most certainly see the appeal in wanting to believe, yes.
ADAM: So... no?
ROBERT: What are your thoughts?
ADAM: I think that after forty-uh-some odd years of life a man such as yourself would have a more... definitive grasp on his feelings toward such an interesting concept.
ROBERT: I'm a man who believes in experience, Adam. When I injure myself, I hurt. I feel pain. It is something I can register. And with the passage of time the wound begins to heal and the pain becomes a thing of the past. I can recall it, but I cannot remember it. It is the same with my emotions. The soul, however - or, my soul, I guess I should say - if it exists, is unresponsive, and therefore I do not believe in it.
ADAM: Ah. Ah-hah.
ROBERT: What do you believe in, Adam?
ADAM: A man who falls into a well hasn’t much luck, has he? He fell into a well. So now what’s he to do?
ROBERT: Well, I imagine he’d feel quite trapped by his situation.
ADAM: Yeah. He could feel any number of things, I suppose... trapped, lonely, hungry - I suppose - and thirsty at some point. But what does he do? Huh?
ROBERT: What does he do?
ADAM: He chooses. Despair or hope. A man in a concentration camp believes - doesn’t he? - that he will make it out... That he will see his family again. Doesn’t he? Why? There’s nothing to suggest it. He sees the barracks thinning... the furnace raging... Why?
ROBERT: I think we all choose to believe what we must to carry on, don’t you?
ADAM: Oh, yes. I think so.
ROBERT: But-
ADAM: I think very much so.
ROBERT: But here is my question for you, though. Why is life the bottom of a well? Why is life a concentration camp?
ADAM: Well there’s something wrong with this world, isn’t there? Something off. Amiss. Awry, that is to say. I mean, the news, murder, crime, brokenness, poverty, despair, savage behavior. They call this human nature, yet we can conceive of so much more... The soul is the promise of more, right? Isn’t it? So you have to believe. Or, at the very least - I suppose - the promise of the possibility of more. If this is all we have- If this is all I have- this body, this life, this brain- If this is what defines me- If this is it... Well, you have to believe, don’t you?

Labels: andronicus, los angeles, robbie williams, writing

posted by Rockel @ 9:06 AM 3 comments

09 February, 2007

Excel-lent

Alright... here's post 499. We're approaching the big one.

And since some of you (and by some of you, I mean most of you [and by most of you I mean probably all of you]) already know the "Big" news, I'll probably attempt to placate you all by posting something I've written to commemorate my big Five-Oh-Oh. I've got most of the first act on the old hard drive, so if you'd like to chime in with your preference, there's the love interests, a guy and his shrink, and a young man and an old artist. Caller number nine wins the package.

And now a little bit about work...

The graph and chart from the previous post were actually compiled from real data from my beloved Rockelburton Inc. They have to do with a certain account we process that does a fundraiser every year... around this time of year. We get a ton of work to process for them. It's not fun. It is a lot of items. It is a lot of data entry. I've revamped the data (taken from processing date Thursday, February 8, 2007) and present it here.

Here is our chart:

The x-axis (numbered 0-2000) represents the number of Items a particular operator keyed/processed.

The y-axis (numbered 0-900) represents the speed with which the same operator keyed/processed (in items/hour)

So here is an example of someone who keyed zero (0) items at (obviously) zero (0) Items/Hour:

Beautiful. That's, like, off the chart terrible. Now here's an example of someone who keyed/processed two thousand (2000) items at a speed of nine hundred (900) Items/Hour:

Wow. That's wicked fast. Ok. Everybody got the idea? Terrific. Let's go back to our empty graph:

Now let's throw in the stats for one of our temps... bleep bleep bloop:

Ooh. Didn't get a lot done... and took her time doing it.

Let's toss in a smattering of a few other employees... bleep bleep bloop:

Alright, we're working our way up the y-axis, which means these guys are faster, but they still aren't getting a whole lot done.

Let's throw in a couple more... bloop bloop bloop bloop bleep bleep:

Alright. We've broken 500 Items/Hour, plus we've got somebody who knocked out 800 items. Not bad.

Unfortunately, we've only got one employee left... yours truly.

Any guesses? Anyone?

Anyone?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
bleep
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
bloop
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
blurp
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
blip:

posted by Rockel @ 4:06 PM 2 comments

08 February, 2007

Four Hundred Ninety-Eight

Behold my mighty Pie Chart...

And my Bar Graph...

They have to do with work... I may explain them later... but the day has been far too long already.

posted by Rockel @ 8:30 PM 2 comments

06 February, 2007

Oscar Predictions

No. I haven't finished mine yet. But neither have you, so it's all good.

Here's the deal:
As soon as I sort mine out I'll post them here... in black and white... for all to see...
As soon as you sort yours out, comment them here... in black and white... for all to see...

I'll assemble all the contenders' predictions into one massive database... I'll purchase a new hard drive just to handle all of this information... and, come February 25th, I'll tally up the results live and in real time, until I am declared the clear and outright winner.

The prize: Pride. I know we can all do with a bit more.

Sound good?

Here's how we'll break it down:

Main Categories -
ACTOR - LEADING
ACTOR - SUPPORTING
ACTRESS - LEADING
ACTRESS - SUPPORTING
ANIMATED FEATURE
ART DIRECTION
CINEMATOGRAPHY
COSTUME DESIGN
DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
FILM EDITING
FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
MAKEUP
ORIGINAL SCORE
ORIGINAL SONG
BEST PICTURE
SCREENPLAY - ADAPTED
SCREENPLAY - ORIGINAL
SOUND EDITING
SOUND MIXING
VISUAL EFFECTS

Tie Breaking Categories -
DOCUMENTARY SHORT
SHORT FILM - ANIMATED
SHORT FILM - LIVE ACTION

One (1) point will be awarded for every correct prediction in the "Main Categories" section, for a possiblility of Twenty (20) total points.

One-tenth (0.1) of one point will be awarded for every correct prediction in the "Tie Breaking Categories" section.

No penalty for wrong predictions, so have at it.

Predictions must be submitted before Ellen takes the stage.

In other news:

DUKE // CAROLINA
Round One
Wednesday, February 7, 2007
Cameron Indoor

The line has UNC by 4... I honestly thought it would be worse than that... and it probably will be... oh well...

CAROLINA SUX!

You are coming to a sad realization. Cancel or allow?

posted by Rockel @ 7:30 PM 1 comments

04 February, 2007

The Rockel Report

I'm still here... here's what's going on:

Work Sux

The Colts Won

It has been a year since I quite smoking.

I finished the pre-First Draft of the first act of a feature length script I'm working on for JC. It's all handwritten, very scattered, and extremely rough. So now comes the task of typing it into "Final Draft," editing bits as I go, and solidifying the final structure of scenes. Once I get all that done I may throw a taste up here for you guys to sample, depending on how much I like certain parts and how much I want to give away.

Investment tip: Buy some stock in Marijuana... it's going up.

My 500th post is approaching with haste... I also have a BIG announcement from the world of Rockel to make... so, hopefully by this next weekend the two will combine into one magnificent event.... check local listings.

posted by Rockel @ 7:43 PM 3 comments

About Me

Name: Rockel
Home:
About Me:
See my complete profile