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The Film of the Week
The WORD of the Week

Matthew 3:7-10

But when he saw many of the Pharisees and Sadducees coming to where he was baptizing, he said to them: "You brood of vipers! Who warned you to flee from the coming wrath?

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance.

And do not think you can say to yourselves, 'We have Abraham as our father.' I tell you that out of these stones God can raise up children for Abraham.

The ax is already at the root of the trees, and every tree that does not produce good fruit will be cut down and thrown into the fire.


Stupid Fact of the Week
There was only one civilian casualty during the three-day Battle of Gettysburg

27 November, 2006
This Just In...
Some surprising news...
More suprising news...
SHOCKINGLY surprising news...
posted by Rockel @ 6:21 PM   1 comments
26 November, 2006
"THE FOUNTAIN...
...may be a deeply flawed film, but at least it is unlike anything else in mainstream theatres right now.""Zardoz anyone?""A pretentious, unfocused, and fussy mess, in which director Darren Aronofsky manages to make Hugh Jackman unattractive and unsympathetic.""It's tough to kick a mewing kitten, even one this stupid and ugly.""A metaphysical melodrama about the quest for eternal life, it makes a pretty decent case for euthanasia; here is what it's like to long for a swift, merciful end.""With its whispered dialogue and funereal tone, The Fountain takes itself far too seriously. No one else will."

Okay, so yes, I saw it. Yes, I loved it. Yes, I'd like to write more, but it's late. Maybe later.

Commence breath holding... now.
posted by Rockel @ 7:22 PM   1 comments
The destruction of the peanut
The Peanut:

In it's natural state, it is a delicious source of proteins, monounsaturated fat, and anti-oxidants.

But humanity adds salt, and sugar, and candy, and chocolate...
...they roast it, and boil it, and fry it...
...they turn it into a sugary paste.

And when that's not good enough, they fabricate artificial chemical compounds to immitate the taste and texture of the sugary paste.

Until one day, somebody says, "Hey, remember how delicious real peanuts were?"

And so he tries one. A real, true, natural, chemical-free, unadulterated peanut.

And you know what? It doesn't taste delicious.
posted by Rockel @ 6:07 PM   0 comments
19 November, 2006
Sunday, November 19, 2006
We'll be missin' ya.

It's Ladies Night at This Political Party.

The Jokester is back...
...but don't worry. Good news...for Republicans.

And, scream it with me:
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

This just in:
Apparently, this is news.
posted by Rockel @ 7:09 PM   2 comments
15 November, 2006
Fed-Ex Fires Back
This post is dedicated to my boy, R-Naz...

From The Graffiti of Truth, Part II: The Emancipation of K-Fed:

"Today I'm a free man. Ladies look out. F-ck a wife. Give me my kids B-tch!"


Well put, K... Well put.

From K-Fed's Hospitality Rider (thank you, The Smoking Gun):

- Six (6) Cans of Red Bull
- One (1) Bottle of Jack Daniels
- One (1) Bottle of Grey Goose Vodka
- Beer??
- Two (2) Packs of Marlboro cigarettes (1 red/ 1 light)
- One (1) Bag of Doritos (Regular or Cool Ranch flavors)
- One (1) Bag of BBQ Chips
- Box of Altoids, red
- Two (2) aromatherapy pillar candles


"Regular" Flavor?

And remeber, kids... T-Shirts still available.
posted by Rockel @ 6:22 PM   1 comments
14 November, 2006
Pardon My Language...
...but you've got to be Fucking Kidding Me!

***Update***

I found something on the t.v. special. As Fark.com puts it: "With balls this big, it's a wonder he can wear pants."
posted by Rockel @ 6:48 PM   3 comments
13 November, 2006
I'm the 485,804,598th Richest Person in the World
How rich are you?

This just in:

This is one of those things that sounds really good... we'll see if it happens.
posted by Rockel @ 7:57 PM   2 comments
"Jagshemash!"
Sacha Baron Cohen keeps getting into trouble...

luckily, there's a Doctor in the house...

Dr. House, M.D.
posted by Rockel @ 5:58 AM   3 comments
08 November, 2006
(465)
posted by Rockel @ 3:38 AM   11 comments
06 November, 2006
My Name Is Matthew Rockel... And I Approved This Post
It's almost here... that glorious day... November the Eighth... My Birthday...

...and My gift... to all of you... no more campaign ads.

You're welcome.

But for right now, you gotta go get your vote on, like good little citizens.


But here's a heads up for all of you... when you go to the polls...

Wear blaze orange.

Also: Mad ups to my boy, Aaron, who turns one quarter of a century Today! Gettin' old. Luckily I still gotst my youth.
posted by Rockel @ 6:16 PM   3 comments
05 November, 2006
The Encore
Something to get you through the week. Enjoy.


posted by Rockel @ 5:45 PM   3 comments
04 November, 2006
A Long Way To Go For A Bad Joke
SIR WALTER RAELIGH...

...was born in 1552, during a time when his father leased Hayes Barton from the Duke family of Otterton. He was half brother to Sir Humphrey and Sir John Gilbert, from his mother's first marriage. He had a brother, Carew, and sister, Margaret.

The spelling used in those days was rather erratic and thus "Raleigh" is just one of the (over 40) ways in which his surname was written. He used numerous of these spellings, with "Rawleigh", "Ralegh" and "Rawley" being more often used than the currently accepted version. His name was pronounced "raw lie" and it is said he is never known to have used the modern "Raleigh" spelling.

He was quite tall (six foot) considering that the average height was lower then than now. He is said to have retained his strong Devonshire accent during all his time at Court. In those days a regional accent was not such a disadvantage as it has been of late.

Considering the Queen's evident affection for him, it was not unexpected that she should be displeased with his love affair with one of her Maids of Honour, Bessie Throckmorton (background). The Queen had him thrown in the Tower of London (click here for picture). He was released after one of his ships brought back a huge treasure on the captured Spanish ship "Madre De Dios".

He married Bessie and retired to his manor at Sherborne, Dorset. Here he built Sherborne Castle in 1594. From 1617 this has been the home of the Digby family (17th. century Earls of Bristol).

In 1603 Queen Elizabeth the first died and James the first took the throne. Raleigh was then framed as a member of a plot against the throne and sentenced to life imprisonment.

Yet again he was released but was then involved in another expedition against the Spanish. Their influence at court managed to have him re-arrested on his previous charge and he was finally sentenced to be beheaded.

At his execution in 1618 he asked to see the axe and said "This is a sharp Medicine, but it is a Physician for all Diseases."

(Bio information taken from here)


All of that to show you this rendering of the execution of Sir Walter Raleigh (you'll notice his hands are tied)...



...and inform those of you that do not already know, that come the new year, I will be...

Raleigh bound. (thank you, thank you)
posted by Rockel @ 2:45 PM   1 comments
03 November, 2006
Hello, Weekend!


It's good to see you again.


posted by Rockel @ 3:09 PM   3 comments
02 November, 2006
You can't spell "Republican" without a big "D"
If you're CNN.
posted by Rockel @ 6:11 PM   0 comments
Wedding Bells are...

It's almost "The Office" time, and opinions seem to be split rather evenly...

last chance to get your vote in.
posted by Rockel @ 3:43 PM   0 comments
"But it wasn't the extra legs that led to its death,...

...more likely an extra anus, Mrs Dickey believes."*
















*Actual quote.
posted by Rockel @ 3:40 PM   0 comments
01 November, 2006
Ode to Leftover Halloween Candy
Reese's

Peanut Butter Cups.


You're always the first to go.


--Rockel. Copyright 2006
posted by Rockel @ 3:42 PM   0 comments
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Lyrics of the Week

ON THE NICKEL
by Tom Waits

("I'd like to do a new song here. This is eh, it's about downtown Los Angeles on 5th Street. And eh all the winos affectionately refer to it as The Nickel. So this is kind of a hobo's lullaby.")

sticks and stones will break my bones,
but i always will be true, and when
your mama is dead and gone,
i'll sing this lullabye just for you,
and what becomes of all the little boys,
who never comb their hair,
well they're lined up all around the block,
on the nickel over there.

so you better bring a bucket,
there is a hole in the pail,
and if you don't get my letter,
then you'll know that i'm in jail,
and what becomes of all the little boys,
who never say their prayers,
well they're sleepin' like a baby,
on the nickel over there.

and if you chew tobacco, and wish upon a star,
well you'll find out where the scarecrows sit,
just like punchlines between the cars,
and i know a place where a royal flush,
can never beat a pair, and even thomas jefferson,
is on the nickel over there.

so ring around the rosie, you're sleepin' in the rain,
and you're always late for supper,
and man you let me down again,
i thought i heard a mockingbird, roosevelt knows where,
you can skip the light, with grady tuck,
on the nickel over there.

so what becomes of all the little boys,
who run away from home,
well the world just keeps gettin' bigger,
once you get out on your own,
so here's to all the little boys,
the sandman takes you where,
you'll be sleepin' with a pillowman,
on the nickel over there.

so let's climb up through that button hole,
and we'll fall right up the stairs,
and i'll show you where the short dogs grow,
on the nickel over there.

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